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The American teachers at my language school had a phrase to describe dating Russian men.

Petersburg after graduating from my overpriced New York liberal arts college.

I’ve heard of guys crawling through windows and appearing naked in bedrooms.

I had female friends who had no idea they were apparently someone’s girlfriend.

I speak the language, I celebrate the holidays, and when I go back to New York after visiting relatives in the motherland and hand my Russian passport to the Russian customs official at border control, watch him quickly flip through it, and then haughtily sneer at me as he asks “, where’s your visa?

” it is with the greatest relish that I slap my American passport onto the desk and yell “That’s my visa! I was born into a crumbling communal building in St.

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